Season Recap - 2010 Cleveland Browns

Final Record: 5-11

Finished:

3^rd Place

in the AFC North

2011 Draft Position: 6^th

Preseason Ranking: 28  
Preseason Letter of Misfortune (by Scottie V):

Seriously, stop crying… He’s gone… He’s not coming back.

In an offseason that has been all Lebron, all the time, it’s been easy to forget there is a football team in Cleveland. And I know many among you have been happy to oblige. No, the Cleveland Browns have not provided much to get excited about the last… well… for about as long as I can remember. It seems like eons ago when Marty Schottenheimer and the gang pounded the ball with Gestapo-like force and the defense blitzkrieged through the league. And they also had the occasional fumble… Sorry, didn’t mean to bring that up.

But, being an optimist, I often believe a miraculous turnaround could be just as simple as finding the right song to play during warmups. The emotional charge resonating from the crowd can impact the players’ outlook greatly. So, with this in mind, I would like to make some recommendations to the Cleveland Browns’ PA announcer.

First some songs to avoid:

• “Cleveland Rocks!” – you’re not fooling anyone
• “Baby Come Back” – yeah, not happening
• “Don’t Know What You’ve Got ‘Til It’s Gone” – appropriate in so many ways, but kind of a downer… and I’m not talking about Lebron or your beloved Brady Quinn. I’m talking about Derek Anderson. Wow, that was dumb booing him out of town.
• “Brown-Eyed Girl” – yes, you are the Browns and this is a classic, but what does it have to do with football?
• “Quinn the Eskimo” – Brady Quinn, the guy you ran Derek out of town for, is no longer with the team either… Oh, and he is not “the mighty Quinn” either… Not appropriate.

Some songs to play to get the crowd inspired and cheer the team on to victory:

“ … “

Ummm… Yeah, I can’t think of any… Sorry.

Prediction: The good news is there will only be 3 teams better than the Browns in the AFC North. The bad news is the AFC North only has 4 teams.

Week 1: Lost at Tampa Bay Buccaneers, 17-14

Ranked – 29

Can't even beat Tampa Bay. Tampa Bay!

Week 2: Lost to Kansas City Chiefs, 16-14

Ranked – 30

0-2 against the likes of Tampa Bay and Kansas City. That can't be good.

Week 3: Lost at Baltimore Ravens, 24-17

Ranked – 31

Three straight weeks you've had the lead in the second half and for the third straight week you've blown your chance to break into the win column. Sadly, your schedule only gets tougher the rest of the season with Cincinnati, Atlanta and Pittsburgh your next three opponents. Talk about being on a fast track to 0-6. 

Week 4: Defeated the Cincinnati Bengals, 23-20

Ranked – 27

Cleveland breaks into the win column with an impressive victory over a division rival. Of course, the rival wasn't Pittsburgh or Baltimore and a three point victory isn't all that impressive. But don't confuse me with the details. The Browns finally won a game and elevated themselves above Forked Few status.  

Week 5: Lost to Atlanta Falcons, 20-10

Ranked – 29

Injuries and decision issues at the quarterback position have the Browns spinning in circles with no clear options.

Week 6: Lost at Pittsburgh Steelers, 28-10

Ranked – 30

A vicious loss against a division rival won't help your rankings any.

Week 7: Defeated the New Orleans Saints, 30-17

Ranked – 26

Who needs offense when the defense can score just as many points?

Week 8: BYE WEEK

Ranked – 26

Hopefully the Browns made the most of their bye week. New England comes to town next weekend and Cleveland will have to play perfect to keep it close.

Week 9: Defeated the New England Patriots, 34-14

Ranked – 22

Let me get this straight. Cleveland can handily beat New England and New Orleans, but they can't beat Tampa Bay, Kansas City, Baltimore, Atlanta or Pittsburgh? I guess Cleveland has played quite the tough schedule so far, with their only weak opponent being the Cincinnati Bengals.

Week 10: Lost to New York Jets, 26-20

Ranked – 21

The Dawg Pound took the Jets to the brink, but couldn't quite seal the deal. Still, they showed a lot of spirit. I don't know. Do you think the Browns and a division title- No.

Week 11: Lost at Jacksonville Jaguars, 24-20

Ranked – 22

Oh, those pesky Jaguars, like the Jets before them. If NFL games were only 58 minutes long instead of 60, Cleveland might be on a three-game winning streak.

Week 12: Defeated the Carolina Panthers, 24-23

Ranked – 21

Scary, scary close win for a Cleveland team that should have dismantled the Panthers before halftime.

Week 13: Defeated the Miami Dolphins, 13-10

Ranked – 21 (ROCKY WEEK!)

            Open Letter from the Browns to the City of Cleveland: We know sometimes we act stupid and we say stupid things, but you kept us around and other people would have said "drop those bums". You give us respect. You know it's kinda hard for us to say these kinda things, cuz this ain't our way, but if we could just unzip ourselves and step out and be someone else, we'd wanna be you. You're all heart, Cleveland.

Week 14: Lost at Buffalo Bills, 13-6

Ranked – 24

Unless you've got Gus kicking field goals for you, you're not going to win any games without crossing the 50 yard line in the second half.

Week 15: Lost at Cincinnati Bengals, 19-17

Ranked – 26

What happened to all the promise from just a few weeks ago? The Browns have gone from mediocre to terrible.

Week 16: Lost to Baltimore Ravens, 20-10

Ranked – 23

A decent showing against a division rival, but there is still a lot of work left to be done in Cleveland.

Week 17: Lost to Pittsburgh Steelers, 41-9

Final Rank - 27

Tomorrow, the 2010 San Francisco 49ers...