Season Recap - 2010 New England Patriots

Final Record: 14-2 (0-1)

Finished: 1^st Place in the AFC East; Lost in the Divisional Round

2011 Draft Position: 28^th

Preseason Ranking:   9
Preseason Letter of Misfortune:

Team of the past decade. The Evil Empire. Everything that is both right and wrong with Boston sports. A coach referred to as a genius. A quarterback ranked among the beautiful. A franchise, once downtrodden, now a failing dynasty.

Most teams around the league would love to have the pedigree of the New England Patriots. No single team challenged your status as the elite franchise of the past ten years. Indianapolis came closest, but ruined their opportunity last season to surpass you when they lost to New Orleans and gave away a chance to accomplish what you could not – finish the season as undefeated Super Bowl champions.

Though you have stumbled of late and injuries have taken their toll on some of your best players, you are still classified among the elites in the AFC, if not the NFL. No franchise has ever been the Team of the Decade twice during the modern era. Green Bay did little in the 70’s, Pittsburgh faltered in the 80’s, San Francisco fell off the map in the 90’s and Dallas stumbled through the last decade.

To start your journey towards unparalleled greatness, you will have to run a gauntlet of fire and emerge unscathed. Twelve of your games are played against playoff teams from last season or division opponents. Only the games against Cleveland and Detroit could be chalked up as outright wins this early in the preseason schedule.

If you weather the storms early and are able to stay healthy late, once again come playoff time fans around the league will be cursing your name and cringing at your cold-blooded efficiency.

Week 1: Defeated the Cincinnati Bengals, 38-24

Ranked – 2

Under the radar, the Patriots quietly demolish the Bengals and move into first in the AFC East after the loud-mouth Jets stumble.

Week 2: Lost at New York Jets, 28-14

Ranked – 9

It's not the end of the world, but it certainly doesn't help you, or the rest of the world, to give the annoying New York Jets their swagger back.

Week 3: Defeated the Buffalo Bills, 38-30

Ranked – 8

You nearly let one get away at home, but the Bills are still hapless and you are still the New England Patriots. Defeating Miami before the bye week will go a long ways to giving you the inside track to the playoffs.

Week 4: Defeated the Miami Dolphins, 41-14

Ranked – 4

How do you gruntle a disgruntled wide receiver? Throw him a catchable pass at the end of the first half for a touchdown he can drop. Then don't throw him any passes in the second half so he finishes catchless for the first time since he's played for your team. Finally, trade him to a former team in the frozen north so he can suddenly become all-motivated again and start to play, because now he wants to play. And last, but certainly not least, destroy him and his new team when they come to Foxboro four weeks from now.

Week 5: BYE WEEK

Ranked – 4

The Patriots were anything but idle during the bye week. Branch may not be better than Moss, but his attitude will be a definite improvement for Brady's team.

Week 6: Defeated the Baltimore Ravens, 23-20

Ranked – 2

Great teams find a way to win, even when down and out with little time left on the clock.

Week 7: Defeated the San Diego Chargers, 23-20

Ranked – 2

Despite the yards and the weird 4th down call at the end of the game, New England continues their winning ways.

Week 8: Defeated the Minnesota Vikings, 28-18

Ranked – 1

At 6-1, New England is once again playing efficient, team football. Brady and Belichick may be the heart and soul (or lack thereof) of this team, but every no-name player has a hand in their success.

Week 9: Lost at Cleveland Browns, 34-14

Ranked – 10

Is their a sudden curse on Creative Misfortune's rankings? The Jets, ranked #1 two weeks ago, were blanked by the Packers at home. The Patriots, ranked #1 last week, were embarrassed by the Browns. Brady better figure out how to move the ball against opposing defenses or New England's season will fall apart quickly with Pittsburgh and Indianapolis looming on the schedule. 

Week 10: Defeated the Pittsburgh Steelers, 39-26

Ranked – 3

As bad as they looked against the Browns two weeks ago, the Patriots showed their bounce-back potential yet again. When was the last time Tom Brady led New England to two straight losses? I can't remember either.

Week 11: Defeated the Indianapolis Colts, 31-28

Ranked – 3

It's always good to beat Indianapolis. It's even better to get to play Detroit on Thanksgiving. Fantasy players, start all your Patriots.

Week 12: Defeated the Detroit Lions, 45-24

Ranked – 3

A home date with the Jets in a potential blizzard. A win cements their standing as the number one team in the AFC.

Week 13: Defeated the New York Jets, 45-3

Ranked – 1 (ROCKY WEEK!)

            [The trainer preps Tom Brady for his next game and slowly wraps his ankles with tape] 

                  

Trainer, whispering and growling: You're the Man. You're number one. The Champ, the best of all time. Girls love you - Men, old people love you. Young people love you. You're the best. You're the Man, and their yours. Their yours, Their yours. These bums shouldn't be on the same field with you. I want you to remind them who you are tonight.

Week 14: Defeated the Chicago Bears, 36-7

Ranked – 1

The Patriots are clearly the best team in the league right now. Their destruction of the Jets and the Bears the last two weeks has proven they are, once again, a force to be reckoned with.

Week 15: Defeated the Green Bay Packers, 31-27

Ranked – 1

A victory over either Buffalo or Miami is all that stands between New England and home-field advantage.

Week 16: Defeated the Buffalo Bills, 34-3

Ranked – 1

With nothing to play for in week 17, how will Belichick approach the game? If history has shown us anything, Brady and the other starters will be on the field late into the game until the Patriots are ahead by 30.

Week 17: Defeated the Miami Dolphins, 38-7

Ranked – 1

A 14-2 record, numerous statistical records and the mystique of the Evil Empire... The Patriots are the NFL's best team and the pressure is on them to win Super Bowl XLV.

Wild Card Game: BYE WEEK

Ranked - 1

The Patriots begin their title run with a tilt against some old friends, ones they would love to humiliate once again in front of a national audience.

Divisional Game: Lost to New York Jets, 28-21

Final Rank - 5

Check back next Monday for a season recap of the 2010 New York J-E-T-S JETS! JETS! JETS!