Pressure? What are you talking about? There is no pressure on my favorite team to perform at a high level this season. That's crazy talk!
Before we continue this Letter of Misfortune, let me be perfectly clear. Yes, the Dallas Cowboys are my favorite team, but not for the reasons you may think. I am not a fan of theirs because of the five Super Bowls they have won (though that doesn’t hurt my loyalty one bit). I cheer for them because of the two Super Bowls they lost in the 70’s to the Pittsburgh Steelers. My dad was a huge Steelers fan when I was growing up and when I learned Dallas was a big rival of Pittsburgh, I became a Cowboys fan just to annoy him. Since then, I have followed the ‘Boys through thick (three Super Bowl championships in the early 90’s) and thin (their dreadful 1-15 season Aikman’s rookie year, but hey, at least they beat Washington).
But I assure you I am not a “homer” fan for the Cowboys. They can do wrong, sometimes as much, if not more, than they do right. I laughed last year when Brandon Marshall weaved through half the Cowboys team on his way to a long touchdown. I found it hysterical when Sensabaugh had absolutely no idea Sydney Rice caught that pass in the divisional playoffs. Like a true fan, I watch them whether they are winning 35-7 or getting crushed by some fool singing “Pants on the Ground”, 34-3. You have no idea how much I hate that video. This season, you will see me predict Dallas lose games, depending on their matchups. As with every other team that takes to the field on Sundays, I will both celebrate Dallas’ victories and make fun of their mistakes, because Creative Misfortune is a double-edged sword that tolerates no Homers. I love the Simpsons. But enough about me. On with the post…
Pressure? All their monkeys are off their back, right? Dallas won the division last year by crushing Philadelphia in dramatic fashion. They won their first playoff game in over a decade by crushing Philadelphia in dramatic fashion. Romo has become a star player. The three-headed running game is among the best in the league. The receiving corps is stacked, even with the near-dead weight of Roy Williams. The offensive line is solid. The defense is strong enough to stonewall the run, skilled enough to defend the pass and mean enough to knock opposing players out. Their kicking game might be a little shaky as they try and convert a kickoff specialist into a true field goal kicker, but this just means more opportunities for Romo and his offense to convert Fourth-and-shorts in opposition territory.
Picked as a favorite to win the Super Bowl by a large number of experts, they better win this year, if no other year. Jerry Jones managed to get Super Bowl XLV to be played in Dallas. Never before has the NFL so aggregiously flirted with home-field advantage in their championship game. Let's just say there was a reason the Super Bowl was played in New Orleans all those years during the Ain't's heyday. Yes, he will make money, regardless of who plays the game, but can you imagine how upset he'll be if the Cowboys are not playing in that game? I mean, all those years he has spent on the sideline learning to be a general manager and a coach would be completely wasted.
Can you imagine somebody other than Dallas playing on behalf of the NFC? Or worse, can you imagine Dallas winning home-field advantage throughout the playoffs, only to lose the NFC Championship game and not go to the Super Bowl? So can I.
And that’s what scares me.
HOW ‘BOUT DEM COWBOYS!
Didn’t you guys, like, just two years ago, ruin the perfect season of the Patriots? What’s happened since then? Tell me, what?
You became the Super Bowl champions in 2007 by defeating one of the greatest teams in NFL history and have been in a tailspin ever since. In 2008, your record actually improved over your Super Bowl season, but you let the Eagles come to your house and embarrass you in the Divsional playoffs. One-and-done is never good, especially when you have the bye week to prepare and home field advantage. And against the Eagles, no less!
Last season the spiral continued and you fell to an 8-8 record. Not good enough to be good, not bad enough to get better, just kind of blah. Where’s the pride, New York? Where’s the sense of power? You’re not even the best team in New Jersey anymore. You're still better than the Knicks, though, so you have that going for you.
While the younger Manning has matured and is becoming a true NFL quarterback, the rest of your team has aged anything but gracefully. The power running game, a staple of Giants teams of the past, became virtually non-existent in 2009. Injuries and poor play kept you from having a 1,000 yard rusher last year. In 2008 you had two! The last time you failed to get a running back over the 1,000 yard plateau was in 2001, when neither Ron Dayne nor Tiki Barber cracked the 900 yard mark.
As a Cowboys fan, I am all for your struggles, but come on. When you combine the mess in Washington with the quarterback situation in Philadelphia and your own difficulties, the NFC East can no longer be viewed as the powerhouse division in the league.
Stand up, mend your broken bones, and run people over like you’ve done in the past – that was beautiful! But don’t lay down like you did last season… unless Dallas is on the opposite sideline.
Tomorrow, letters to the Philadelphia Eagles and the Washington Redskins...
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