Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Creative Misfortune Power Rankings - Week 3

Creative Misfortune Power Rankings are based on a complicated formula that takes into account, among other things, a team's projected ability to score an Offensive Fumble Recovery TD. All power rankings guaranteed to be less accurate than real NFL team abilities on any given Sunday and are subject to change on a weekly basis. If your team’s ranking remains unchanged for 4 hours or more, please consult with your doctor, as serious side effects may occur.

When it comes to Creative Misfortune Power Rankings, winning isn't the only thing, but it is the most important component of the rating. I don't believe teams can be powerful if they consistently lose, even to other great teams.

The Forked Few ~
     Abandon hope and fortune all ye who rank here
    
     # 32 - Detroit Lions (previous: 31)
                     Against Chicago and Philadelphia you looked like you were so close to breaking through, but you laid an egg against Minnesota - a division rival you have typically played well against. Your ineptness on Sunday coupled with St. Louis' ability to win a game lands you in the Creative Misfortune cellar.

     # 31 - Cleveland Browns (previous: 30)
                     Three straight weeks you've had the lead in the second half and for the third straight week you've blown your chance to break into the win column. Sadly, your schedule only gets tougher the rest of the season with Cincinnati, Atlanta and Pittsburgh your next three opponents. Talk about being on a fast track to 0-6. 

     # 30 - Buffalo Bills (previous: 29)
                     Playing valiant in defeat means you still lost. And how misguided was your coaching staff if up until the start of the regular season you believed Trent Edwards was the guy only to cut him last week for Ryan Fitzpatrick? Your decision making skills have always been suspect, so this move comes as no surprise to anybody. If only Brad Childress had the same courage to swallow his pride and admit he was wrong about T-Jack...

     # 29 - Carolina Panthers (previous: 28)
                     Jimmy Clausen wasn't the answer on Sunday, though it is still too early to tell how his career will play out. For now, the Panthers are up the creek without a paddle and have already lost all hope during what should have been a promising season.

     # 28 - San Francisco 49ers (previous: 26)
                     Offensive coordinator - GONE! Personally, I'd look at the defense. Yes, the offense hasn't scored much, but the defense has allowed 31, 25 and 31 points in three straight games and the saddest part of those scores is New Orleans only scored 25. Allowing Seattle and Kansas City to both ring up 31 points on the aggressive, Singletary-masterminded defense is just outrageous.


The Creatively Challenged ~
     Folly remains ever their mistress
    
     # 27 - St. Louis Rams (previous: 32)
                      Sam Bradford shows definite promise as the quarterback of the future, but the Rams will have to beat more teams than just the Redskins before they can truly start to climb out of the ranks of the Forked Few.

     # 26 - Oakland Raiders (previous: 27)
                      Janikowski, the problem child. In a game lost by one point, a few missed field goals certainly could have made a difference. On the bright side, Gradkowski, the other -owski on the team, played solid again. The Raiders aren't back, but they are definitely improved from a year ago.

     # 25 - Jacksonville Jaguars (previous: 25)
                     Not good, Jacksonville. Nobody should lose at home 28-3. Do you even care anymore? At 0-3 you are clearly the worst team in the AFC South and only a win streak of epic proportions will get you a sniff of the playoffs.

     # 24 - New York Giants (previous: 22)
                     I am no quarterbacking expert, but I gotta believe trying a left-handed shovel pass into triple coverage while being tackled may not have been the best choice in that situation, Eli. Would Peyton have done that? I don't think so.

     # 23 - Washington Redskins (previous: 23)
                     You'd think losing to the Rams would warrant a drop in the rankings, but with so many bad teams playing woeful football, I can't help but let Washington just sit here at #23 and think about what they have done.

     # 22 - Denver Broncos (previous: 16)
                    Nearly 500 yards passing from Kyle Orten is still not enough to get this team closer than two touchdowns against Manning and the Colts. In an upside down AFC West, the Broncos still aren't out of it, but they need a few wins here in a hurry otherwise these horses will need to be put out of their misery.

     # 21 - Dallas Cowboys (previous: 24)
                     Desperation and urgency lead to a solid road victory against the Texans, but has all the momentum already been lost by an early bye week? We'll find out in week 5 when the Titans come to town.


The Remarkably Average ~
     Dancing the fine line between misfortune and glory
    
     # 20 - Tampa Bay Buccaneers (previous: 11)
                    In a battle of unbeatens you were clearly, resoundly beaten. Pittsburgh destroyed you in all aspects of the game and showed you how much more difficult it is to beat Creative Elite teams than those counted among Forked Few.

     # 19 - Miami Dolphins (previous: 10)
                     So close to taking solid possession of the AFC East, and now so far away. In a three-way fight, you needed every advantage you can get.

     # 18 - Minnesota Vikings (previous: 21)
                     Yay! You beat Detroit! We're happy for ya.

     # 17 - San Diego Chargers (previous: 6)
                     Like Rocky, you "yo, yo" through the power rankings. We're good, we're not so good. We're good, we're not so good. Wouldn't that be something if you stumbled through the regular season and then went on a tear through the playoffs? Man, that would confuse some poeple.

     # 16 - Seattle Seahawks (previous: 20)
                      One thing appears certain - the Seahawks like playing at home.

     # 15 - Arizona Cardinals (previous: 19)
                      You dodged a bullet on Sunday. Multiple bullets. A team of your caliber shouldn't need to get lucky to beat teams like the Oakland Raiders.

     # 14 - Houston Texans (previous: 3)
                      Everything was going your way, you just overlooked the other team from Texas and couldn't muster the same motivation you had when Indianapolis came to visit. If you want to take that elusive step forward this year, you can't lose games like this at home.

     # 13 - Cincinnati Bengals (previous: 18)
                      In the rain, it's difficult to throw the ball, but at least the running game and the defense rose to the occasion against a struggling foe. Win on the road in Cleveland next week and you might almost be considered among the Fortunate Seven after three straight wins.


The Fortunate Seven ~
     The best of those not yet elite
    
     # 12 - Tennessee Titans (previous: 17)
                      You made the Giants look as bad on Sunday as the Steelers made you look the Sunday before.

     # 11 - Philadelphia Eagles (previous: 15)
                      Maybe Vick is the answer after all, but he has yet to be tested by a strong defensive team. Next week McNabb comes back to town. How will the Philadelphia fans greet him?

     # 10 - New Orleans Saints (previous: 2)
                      A terrible missed field goal in overtime and silly coaching games cost the Saints this division matchup. Unlike last year, New Orleans is looking a bit more mortal every week and the NFC looks like it will be end up being a war of attrition more than a sprint to the finish. The Saints can definitely run the footrace, but can they win the knock-down, drag-out battles they will need to in order to emerge as champions once again?

       # 9 - New York Jets (previous: 13)
                      Road wins against division opponents are always difficult to come by and for the second straight week Mark Sanchez plays error free. If he keeps it going, the Jets will be flying high come January, because the defense and running game provide a solid foundation for the Sanchize.

       # 8 - New England Patriots (previous: 9)
                      You nearly let one get away at home, but the Bills are still hapless and you are still the New England Patriots. Defeating Miami before the bye week will go a long ways to giving you the inside track to the playoffs.

       # 7 - Baltimore Ravens (previous: 14)
                       The defense is showing signs of aging. At least the offense can score points as long as Flacco makes good decisions and doesn't turn the ball over too many times. But what happened to the running game? You haven't forgotten about Rice have you?

       # 6 - Atlanta Falcons (previous: 8)
                      You dodged a bullet in New Orleans, but that doesn't matter because you made the most of your opportunities and cashed in against the defending champions. With a half game lead in the division and two solid victories in a row, the Dirty Birds are poised to soar into the Creative Elite. But not this week. They still have some victories yet to achieve.

The Creative Elite ~
       Wielding misfortune at its finest
      
       # 5 - Indianapolis Colts (previous: 7)
                      Manning makes everybody he plays with better. Practice squad players on other teams don't score key touchdowns on their own recommended "slant-and-up" calls. A tip of the hat to Manning who continues to use all the weapons available to him to keep the Colts on the winning track. 

       # 4 - Green Bay Packers (previous: 1)
                     A tough loss on Monday Night made worse by far too many mistakes and careless play. Maybe the Bears are actually good this year, but in the long run the Packers will be better. No team can stay ranked #1 after making too many inexcusable errors under primetime lights.

       # 3 - Kansas City Chiefs (previous: 12)
                    I am starting to believe. Come out of the bye week and upset the Colts at home and nobody will ever doubt you the rest of the season.

       # 2 - Chicago Bears (previous: 5)
                    You now stand as the sole remaining undefeated team in the NFC. After a tough victory over your bitter, division rivals, you have solidified your spot among the Creative Elite until the INT Cutler of old re-appears and drives you from these hallowed ranks.

       # 1 - Pittsburgh Steelers (previous: 4)
                    Without Big Ben the Steelers have played lights out defensive football. Now throw in a little offense and Pittsburgh is nigh unstoppable. A tough division test againt Baltimore looms where anything could happen.

Week 3 Power Ranking Awards:

The Free Fallers - Houston Texans (-11), San Diego Chargers (-11), Miami Dolphins (-9) and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers (-9)

The Biggest Movers - Kansas City (+9), Baltimore Ravens (+7), Tennessee Titans (+5) and the Cincinnati Bengals (+5)

Maintaining The Status Quo - Jacksonville Jaguars (25) and the Washington Redskins (23)

Creative Misfortune Super Bowl XLV Favorite ~ After Week 3

Indianapolis Colts

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